Sunday, 21 June 2015

What's That Smell?

"Home is where the heart is"... or so they say. But in my case it usually seems like "home is where that hideous smell is"! Odour is that secret weapon this world has to irritate us beyond our senses. I wake up to the guff of garbage wafting in through the windows in the wee hours of the morning. Every single day begins with an assault to my olfactory system. I spring out of my bed and slide the windows shut, hoping to bring the situation under control. But, I realize with a heavy heart, the damage is already done.

I walk into the bathroom and it smells funny again. I check if the block of air freshener is remaining, and it is. Then why is that obnoxious smell still lingering in the air? I turn on the faucet and squeeze out a big glob of bubble bath liquid. The aromatic smell should subdue the stink for some time, I hope. I foam up a lot of bubbles and after a long, relaxing bath, walk into my closet to pick my outfit for the day.

My senses are overpowered with the strong stench of naphthalene balls, and my clothes exude the same whiff. I quickly pull out a blue and white tunic and spray Chanel No. 5 generously all over me. I cannot go into important meetings smelling of naphtha!

When I open my dressing drawer to pick out my favourite shade of pink lipstick, I sniff a trace of expired makeup. The shelf makes me nauseous with the mixed toxic fumes of powder, compact, foundation, blush and nail polish. I make a mental note to dispose off the old stuff and buy some new makeup.

After brushing my hair, I head over to the shoe rack to find a pair of matching stilettos to go with my dress. I almost double over as I take in the reeking pair of socks that I had stuffed back in my sneakers after a sweaty run in the rain last evening. I instantaneously pick up the offending pair of socks and chuck them in the washing machine.

I finally step out of my home and let out the breath I have been holding. The world outside smells so much better than my malodorous house!

The smell of rotten eggs is horrendous!

I am back home at seven thirty in the evening, very excited for my date with the cute guy I met in office. But the moment I enter my apartment, I am welcomed by that fetid atmosphere again. I panic at the thought of having such a handsome and fine-smelling man witness my smelly house. I quickly run to the nearest supermarket and bring home a room spray.

After drowning the whole place in the scent of lavender, I enter the kitchen to cook some delicious pasta for dinner. When I open the fridge to take out the bottle of zinfandel, the foul smell of rotten eggs scares me. I discard the bad eggs into the organic wastebin, and try to concentrate on the pasta.

It is almost eight. He must be here any minute now. I set the table and change into a sexy backless pink tunic. I roll on a fruity fragrance and pray for the drawing room to smell better. The bell rings, and I can hear my heart beating in my ears. What do you think will happen? Will I have a great date or will my love interest be turned off by my smelly home? Do you have any tips to rescue my evening? Write in to me!

I am blogging for #SmellyToSmiley activity at in association with Ambi Pur.

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